A message for Martin from Hayley
Created by Hayley 4 years agoTurning my feelings for Martin into a fitting message feels near impossible. He was such a one off and became such an essential part of our family.
As Rob has said, giving name to his role is tricky - if I talk about him as my stepdad, it doesn’t do justice to the role he played and feels cold. To me, he grew to be a parent. A hugely valued, unexpected parent, you might say, and one I would not have been the same without.
He went on to become the greatly loved and much laughed with Grandad Bert to my children. So brilliant in this role that his newest grand-daughter’s middle name is Bertie, in his memory and in hope that she will inherit a smidge of his character.
As I try to sum up his meaning to me, it’s clear that Martin is an important ingredient in what I think of as home.
He and my mum were without doubt each other’s person- they had so much love & laughter between them and in building that life with mum, Martin took to building a life with me and Rob as well. There must have been a million times that I pushed his patience to the limit with my teenage dramas, leaving the lights on or teasing him for reading the Daily Mail. But what he returned was his steady support, a lack of judgement, and love - all served with his well-known sense of humour.
Martin was a doer, he cared for us in cleaning our cars, cutting our hedges, never letting us wash the pots, and pushing us to get out and run off a hangover. I will remember him striding purposefully ahead of our group on a walk (not always in the right direction), enjoying a good few pints, egging me on to race uphill on runs, being soft as muck with every animal he met and always having a silly comment to make us laugh.
What I will most fondly remember of the many years with Martin are his almost endless patience, his completely endless kindness, his determination to crack on and get things done, and his irresistible daftness.
Martin, I think the world of you and will miss you enormously. I feel very lucky to have had you around and will endeavour to laugh often in your honour.
With love from H x
As Rob has said, giving name to his role is tricky - if I talk about him as my stepdad, it doesn’t do justice to the role he played and feels cold. To me, he grew to be a parent. A hugely valued, unexpected parent, you might say, and one I would not have been the same without.
He went on to become the greatly loved and much laughed with Grandad Bert to my children. So brilliant in this role that his newest grand-daughter’s middle name is Bertie, in his memory and in hope that she will inherit a smidge of his character.
As I try to sum up his meaning to me, it’s clear that Martin is an important ingredient in what I think of as home.
He and my mum were without doubt each other’s person- they had so much love & laughter between them and in building that life with mum, Martin took to building a life with me and Rob as well. There must have been a million times that I pushed his patience to the limit with my teenage dramas, leaving the lights on or teasing him for reading the Daily Mail. But what he returned was his steady support, a lack of judgement, and love - all served with his well-known sense of humour.
Martin was a doer, he cared for us in cleaning our cars, cutting our hedges, never letting us wash the pots, and pushing us to get out and run off a hangover. I will remember him striding purposefully ahead of our group on a walk (not always in the right direction), enjoying a good few pints, egging me on to race uphill on runs, being soft as muck with every animal he met and always having a silly comment to make us laugh.
What I will most fondly remember of the many years with Martin are his almost endless patience, his completely endless kindness, his determination to crack on and get things done, and his irresistible daftness.
Martin, I think the world of you and will miss you enormously. I feel very lucky to have had you around and will endeavour to laugh often in your honour.
With love from H x
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